Trail run Fail

I spent last week in Colorado Springs on vacation. Mostly I like to hike and see the city but this time I also signed up for a race. I did one half marathon before so I thought I could do one again. Now I run throughout the week so I figured I was in shape for a 13.1 mile run. The race was through trails and although I’d never done any serious trail stuff I wanted to try. The “trail” part of the run scared me enough go to the park a day early and walk the route. I downloaded a GPS app for my phone and followed the map through the woods. I got there a bit early and bumped into the race coordinator setting up cones and tying ribbons on tree branches. I let him finish before I walked the remainder.

Walking the route make me realize pretty quick that I wasn’t going to set any records on this one. Steep hills and drops, rough ground and a very zig zaggy path made for brutal course. A few people got lost on the first lap of the race. Partly due to where the cones were positioned and partly because it was downhill, they zoomed right through the trail split. I nearly followed them but remembered the route from walking earlier in the day and got back on line.  I managed the first lap by jogging most of the way and walking up the higher rises. The second lap did me in. I think I’d mentally given up after the first one and just hoped to get in one more. So I started a half marathon and completed a 10k.

Should I have finished the full distance? I’ve thought about that since. I could have gone back and walked the whole course 2 more times. It was a 3.3 mile loop that meant I had to run around it 4 times to complete a half marathon. It just seemed silly to walk it, anyone can do that. I just need more practice on trails next time. I wanted to blame the altitude or my lack of sleep or not getting enough water but really, I just wasn’t ready this time.

At least I enjoyed myself the rest of the time. I saw the US Olympic training center and finally went to Pikes Peak. The failed race was a downer on an otherwise pleasant trip.

Bits of Weird

It’s the little things in life that irritate, befuddle, confound.

 We all have quirky elements of character that regular people shake their heads at, bits of weird really.  Some of us are rule Nazis about board games. Any deviation in standard practice creates a seismic shift in gravitational pull of the earth. Some wear black socks like it’s the only color option. With athletic shorts and sandals? yup. With board shorts and tank tops? yup. With undershirts and boxers? what else. There doesn’t need to be a deeply held reason either. Some quirks just feel right.

 So here is one of my bits of weird. I need to carry everything in from the car in one heaping trip. Mostly I go to the gym or run after work so I’m usually sweaty and gross, not to mention irritable. The day is ruined however, if I can’t strategically carry all my goods safely into the house in one go. It’s not an art exactly but it must happen in the same way or precious time is wasted on an exhaustive second trip to the car to scrounge around for items not worthy to be carried the first time. Generally I throw the sweaty towel over my neck first.

Second come the keys from the ignition but I can’t pocket them. I need them for the door so they have to stay in my right hand. If it’s dark out, this is critical, I must select the door key while the light from the dashboard is still on. This can go south quickly. A fumble at the doorstep and I’ll have to set everything down and search in the dark for right key. Then I have to pick everything back up in the proper order once the door unlocks and stumble in.

After picking the right key and holding it tightly I reach for the morning’s empty coffee cup, usually tucked under the front passenger seat. I hate leaving things overnight in the car, another weird thing. Then comes the wallet from the center counsel and the frequently neglected phone in the cup holder. Both go in the front right pocked of whichever shorts I happen to be wearing.  Next I tuck the cup gently under my left arm. I’ve lost a couple of nice mugs this way so I’ve learned the right amount of pressure and movement. It’s a delicate balance. I move around the back of the car (SUV) and pop open the hatch. I sling the laptop shoulder bag and the gym duffel over my left shoulder, this way I still have a free hand in case I happen to have a bag of groceries or a watermelon. One bag is the limit though because I only have one free hand, the other one holds the all important key. If I can carefully close the door with the key hand I’m basically home free.

The last part is the approach up the steps and to the door. I don’t dare get cocky though.   The most common screw ups are trying to grab the mail from the mailbox with the key hand and subsequently dropping the key into the darkness, tripping on the steps and dropping the mug and laptop on the concrete, or trying to press the car lock bottom on the key fob and letting the house key slip down the ring and having to find it again. It’s all an exhausting bit of choreography. My angry outbursts are completely uneven to the gravity of the situation though. I’m getting better.  

What I can’t quite figure is, why do I feel the need to do it one trip? My car sits roughly 8 paces from the front door. Maybe it goes back to when I lived in an apartment and had to park 50 yards or more from the door. Maybe it’s a particular interest, I did NOT say obsession, with efficiency. Whatever the reason I get too upset about silly things in life that aren’t that important.

I’m learning to be more grateful for health, both physical and mental. Also grateful that phones and laptops and lights actually work in this country. The electricity is reliable and the gas, cable and internet come right into the house. The grocery stores don’t run out of food, unless there is a tornado on the way in which case you should’ve got there earlier. The roads are paved, the sewers run underground and the trash is collected every week. We can worship freely and say almost anything in public. A lot of us own cars and houses and toys like boats and swimming pools and motorcycles. We take vacations to places where often, the little things like electricity, gas and phones don't work as well.

Gratitude for stuff and gratitude for condition goes a long way toward easing stress over daily problems, real and imagined. Being grateful for little things in the same measure that we stress out over them is the antidote to anxiety. The quirky bits of weird are just part of who we are. We accept it and move on.

Sometimes you have to break a few coffee mugs to realize it.

Andrew Luck

Andrew Luck’s retirement is surprising in its abruptness. There is the usual exaggeration from sportswriters and TV talking heads. Being a beat writer makes for some genuine cynicism. The lies and distortions from front offices creates antagonism, fear and loathing in the reporters. The most annoying ones are the 'what-does-this-say-about-society' types that never miss a change to remind fans how immoral we all are. Some are already signaling the death of football and blaming the fans in the process. Jamele Hill at the Atlantic thinks Luck is Exhibit A in “evolving” players retiring before injuries completely ruin any chance at a normal life.

Not all fans are actually capable of seeing the humanity of the players they follow so closely. When the allure of the game is rooted in violence, and in conformity to whatever the team demands, players are treated as physical objects and nothing more.

The tone is one of finger waging. “How can you watch this sport that glorifies pain?” First of all the “allure of the game” is that most of couldn’t make a college roster at any spot, let alone an NFL team. There is an excellence most people will never know, it’s a mystique. We love football because only the toughest, most athletic and physically gifted among us can do it. Yes it is violent but the violence isn’t arbitrary or excessive, it’s a game of rules. Players aren’t treated as “physical objects and nothing more”. They couldn’t sell us life insurance or deodorant, loafers or pizza if we regarded them as mere pawns. Their value doesn’t extend beyond the team in though; we rely on their greatness as long as the team wins. That isn’t very different from the corporate world is it?

If we are seeing a move away from long careers then so be it. The salaries are extremely high because of the risky nature. Commercial fisherman, coal miners and soldiers would be fortunate to earn such a massive take. It pays well because so few can do it, also because we pay to watch. Andrew Luck made a very reasonable calculation; he’d made enough money to live comfortably. Better to get out while still relatively healthy. I think the timing was terrible and he should have done this last season, or waited until this one was over.

Some fans booed him as he headed for the tunnel. The story is that Luck retired after a short career, at least for someone with such a bright future. But a lot of sports writers and opinion talkers are making it about the booing. This from Deadspin:

“It never ceases to amaze me how some idiots can get so caught up in a fandom that they forget the players on the field are human beings.”

I think the fans can be given a break here. Booing is always ugly but their superstar quarterback quits right before the season and their supposed to sing ‘thanks for the memories’ and he strolls out of stadium in a T-shirt? They’re a little pissed off and they should be. If you hired a manager to run your business and he quit right at the beginning of the project, you’d be upset too.

 The criticism of Luck by the fans reflects the short notice of the news. It’s like “Oh by the way, your potential hall of fame quarterback is retiring today, have a great season.” If doesn’t matter what the reason, he left you dry. The anger will wane though. Give it a season and they’ll appreciate his years and effort. I don’t think anyone believes Andrew Luck wouldn’t play if he could perform reasonable well.  He won’t get a Peyton Manning type reception in Indy, but he won’t get the villain treatment forever. Colts fans will come around eventually and look to the future. 

Enough please about us fans not treating players like human beings. You can find ugliness in fans all over the league. But I won’t feel guilty about watching a game with a high probability of injuries for the athletes. It’s made a lot of people very wealthy and provided comfortable living standards for those with few other options.

There is a hard truth that comes with playing professional team sports. The team is bigger than any one player. That’s especially true in football where a bad turn or awkward hit can end a career overnight. It’s sad when injuries keep guys out, but the games go on and the only thing retiring players should feel is gratitude. Gratitude for the ability and the chance to play the toughest game around and rake in some serious money for their efforts. 

Gratitude that people thought so much of you, that they booed your decision to step away.   

Hong Kong Protests

What’s the deal with the massive protests in Hong Kong? Something like 2 million people have taken to the street to protest a law from the Chief Executive, Carrie Lam. The law makes it possible for Hong Kong residents to be extradited to the mainland for trial. That may not seem like a big deal, but it’s the difference democracy and dictatorship. Would you rather have your democratic court try you or be sent to a country with no tradition of fairness or rule of law? Most of us would be in the streets I think.

 Here is a very short history of Hong Kong: China is responsible for Hong Kong because ‘governorship’ of the territory passed to Beijing in 1997 by the British. They had managed it since the middle 1800’s, during the Opium Wars.

 Before the 1980’s the China was a big, poor country. They had a lot of people and a lot of space but a weak central government. After realizing that they could sell opium to the Chinese, British merchants began bringing it in. The Chinese resenting having a foreign power on so close to home, especially one selling opium. They attacked and lost in the first Opium War 1841.They had no choice but to make a deal over Hong Kong, and later Kowloon. Chinese leaders, in 1896 ceded control over the southern territories for 99 years.

 Once the lease was up in 1997, the Brits had to give back control of the territory to the mainland. Originally they tried for a co-governmental option under Margret Thatcher but the president at the time Deng Xiaoping, convinced them Hong Kong could be occupied overnight if he wanted. In other words “Don’t make us take it”. This was in the 80’s before the lease was up and the British were laying out legal ways for Hong Kong to remain a vibrant, capitalist city. Xiaoping wanted an economic zone with its own governing body and separate rules. It’s basically what they have today, two regions with different governments. Hong Kong has its own currency and government but remains under the umbrella of the big brother to the north.

Really I don’t think the agreement matters that much. Once Great Britain pulled their offices and administrations, Hong Kong was always going to be subjected to the whims of Beijing. China could say whatever it wanted, ignore any agreement and impose any rules or rulers loyal to Beijing. No one could stop once the Brits left. Not that Beijing was ever going to send in the troops and lock down the city but time was on the side of China after 1997.

They’ve played the long game pretty well. There have been a few high profile protests in the last 5 years. Once in 2014 over the selection of the city’s Chief Executive position who Beijing insisted be approved by a committee of pro China officials. This is like telling your girlfriend “We can eat anywhere you want as long it’s at Chili’s or Olive Garden”. It isn’t really a choice when someone else selects the choices for you.

The current protest feels like an extension of the 2014 ones. Carrie Lam the Chief Executive tried to get a motion passed that makes it possible for China to charge citizens of Hong Kong in mainland courts. This is a recipe for political and religious persecution. Any high profile person could be rounded up sent to Chinese courts which don’t have nearly any protection for the innocent. If you anger the leadership you get arrested. If you preach against oppression of the Communists, you can be arrested. Christians that have run afoul of Chinese laws by starting churches can be arrested. Artists that criticize the state can be tried in Chinese courts.

China doesn’t want the South to become a safe haven for those with grievances against the Communist government.

 Hongkongers rightfully objected so Lam ‘suspended’ the law after the uprising and outrage. She needs to remove it completely and move on. The protests are mostly peaceful and as long as Lam gets in line this should be over soon. There is always the chance that China gets embarrassed and sends in troops to beat up the little ‘punks’. I don’t see that happening though.

For the long term I think it's good that Hong Kong citizens react so quickly to any limits on their freedoms. It sends a message to the leaders in China that they aren't going to run over a way of life that Hongkongers hold dear. 

Baseball's Own "Florida Man"

It’s become a fun routine to check the news for “Florida Man” stories. It’s more of a meme than anything. These are odd, often embarrassing news events centered on real people in Florida. Here are a couple of my favorite headlines:

“Florida Man in ‘No, Seriously, I have drugs” T-Shirt Arrested for Possession of Drugs”

 “Florida Man Gets Tired of Waiting at Hospital, Steals Ambulance, Drives Home” 

“Florida Man denies Drinking and Driving, Says He only Swigged Bourbon at Stop Signs”

 Nothing personifies the spirit of “Florida Man” more aptly than the Biogenesis scandal that took down Alex Rodriquez and further bloodied the MLB.

I saw a documentary that explained the whole fiasco. It's called Screwball because the story plays out in a zany ridiculous way. It’s one of those times when you lose faith in people and start thinking everyone is working an angle. The director Billy Corben had a lot of fun with it. He used kids in the dramatic recreations to give it a light hearted  slap-sticky feel.

Tony Bosch had a small time clinic in Coral Gables for weight loss and hormone replacement therapy. He was a glorified prescription writer operating under the radar but with a veneer of respectability. His father was a physician listed as the medical director and his signature was needed for the scrips. Tony Bosch goes to great lengths to explain to us (the audience) that he is a ‘real’ doctor, just not licensed for Florida. His dodgy demeanor seeps through like sweat on a cotton shirt. He isn’t Al Capone though. He’s more like “Dr. Nick” the infamous quack from the Simpsons.

His business runs along pretty smooth until he gives advice to some weight lifters on how to get on a cycle of steroids. The connection to sports and athletes begins in that bar. From there he meets Manny Ramirez, puts him on a schedule with strict instructions not to alter the plan. But Manny being Manny alters the plan.

He gets caught on a random test. Ramirez gets suspended while Dr. Bosch disappears for a while and stays away from baseball. He expands his regular Florida business with equally dubious tanning salon guys (think Jersey Shore) that own a string of buildings across Miami. One of the regular customers of the salon, Porter Fischer, becomes a customer of Tony Bosch and even loans Biogenesis some money. Porter is quite naive about the whole operation. He believes the clinic and Tony Bosch are on the level. His investment is a measly $4000 but Tony never repays, despite the constant badgering from Porter.

Porter steals some of Tony’s records to teach him a lesson, including the A-rod notebooks that show him as a paying customer. To think this entire fiasco could have been avoided if the good Dr. would have paid back the 4 grand, it’s almost unbelievable.

Porter clearly didn’t know what he’d done. He is referred to a few times as a sucker in the film but “sucker” doesn’t quite capture it. He ran afoul of some dangerous people and didn’t realize it until very late in the game. His smartest move was going to the local press. After he shows the books to a reporter there is nothing stopping the tsunami of lawsuits and theft, blackmail and legal wrangling. Lucky for Porter this group of misfits wasn’t quite ‘mob’ enough to take him out. Once the story hit the national press he stood a better chance of staying alive.

 It’s the ultimate “Florida Man” news story that snowballs into a media blitz involving celebrities, Major League Baseball and the FBI. All because a sleazy doc selling growth hormone to retirees refused to pay back a measly 4 grand. No one looks good in this.

Alex Rodriguez is an especially loathsome character. He actually hired protesters to hold up supportive signs and shout good will to him as he entered the courthouse in his challenge to the MLB. How did he pay them? With pizza.

I’ve only skimmed it here. The unfolding mess of a story is too good to be fiction. It must be Florida.

Training and Accountability

I was off work today so I decided to a usual short run. I’ve managed to put in 3 days a week on average, although I’m likely to miss a day and settle for 2. I’m planning another half marathon in September, in Colorado. That’s my vacation time and who doesn’t love that state? Rocky Mountain National Park is breathtaking. It just demands to be seen. The Grand Canyon is first on my list but the Rocky Mountains are just ridiculous. Someday I’d like to see Yellowstone but I haven’t made that trip yet. Nor California which is also packed full of natural beauty. 

Not my fault; it’s a big country.

The elevation should make the race interesting. I’d like to run the entire distance (13.1 miles) but without acclimating myself first, I’ll have to take it slow. Currently the weather here in Tulsa is brutal. It has rained a lot which pushed up the humidity even when the sun is overcast. I went for a long run on Sunday with the intention of getting a full 9 miles in. It didn’t go well. The humidity was upwards of 90 degrees and I was as wet as I would have been if the sky opened up and poured rain. Not having the sun in my face was great but the wetness slowed me up quicker than I expected. I only made 7.5 miles. Mostly I can struggle for a few miles and trudge the last bit feeling like I’m pulling a school bus. This time I couldn't.  

I went out again today and huffed through a miserable 3 miles. It’s frustrating to see others out on the trail seemingly dealing with the hot weather like they hadn’t noticed. I barely get around the 3 mile loop and they’re circling it again, with just a touch of perspiration. I know I shouldn’t compare. Especially when circumstances like age, experience and athletic ability come into play. But we do anyway right? I think most of us are competitive to a degree. There is continent size gap between individual levels though. Everyone knows at least one person who must win, at everything, all the time. Others can’t be roused to even try. Both are frustrating but under the right situations we all show grit when our particular sport, game or skill is tested. 

The best way to compete is with yourself, or rather the self you used to be. I like that Apple watch commercial where the guy passes his old self up on the way to exercising gains. He walks right by a slower version of himself and then runs by the walking version of himself. Soon he is swimming and biking in a competitive race. At every level he gets faster and stronger, ultimately healthier.

It’s true in running and it’s true in life, looking back at where you were and seeing improvement is the truest form of success. It’s also the easiest to control. 

There is an accountability aspect of why I started jogging in the first place. I needed to get healthier and lose weight too, but mostly I needed a goal or standard to hold myself to. Writing is the same way. I couldn’t improve unless I created a blog and forced myself to update it regularly. OK, so I don’t put things up every day or even 3 times a day like a proper blogger would. But even that is subject to a lookback, an accounting of how far I’d come. I think a lot of this ‘needing-a-larger-purpose' stuff is rooted in single life. Married people have kids and spouses, and soccer games and school plays, vacations and planning. They are weighted down with responsibility.  Single people have time, too much time really.

Time gets wasted so frequently (if you don’t have kids) that the real challenge is in being constructive. Doing something worthwhile for yourself and others is important for spiritual and mental health. Without accountability we wither on the vine, we can’t move forward and get better, even if getting better at our own slow pace.

Accountability is a first principle. Once you establish its necessity, you can build out from there and take small steps. Improvement comes slowly but it does come. Looking back at the milestones can be fun once accountability is in play. So I'll keep running and churning and pulling the school bus until the next race.

Guilt Free Napping

I took a long afternoon nap the other day. I set the alarm for an hour and passed out, hearing my own faint snoring as I drifted into dreamland. Nothing is quite as wonderful as a late day nap on a non-work day. Obviously I don’t sleep at work. I don’t sit for long stretches unless I’m in front of the computer. I move around a lot, walking the distance of the warehouse and retail store multiple times per day. I sit down to type up orders during slow times and screw around on facebook enter quotes for customers. Mostly I go from walking to hustling. Reading puts me out, after a few chapters my head starts bobbing like a fishing lure.

Napping like this reminds of the days I used to get up early on Saturdays for landscaping. This was before I had a part time job, so likely around 14 or 15 years old. My brother and I both worked for a teacher who had a mowing business in the summer. The summer work was short but the mowing, raking, trimming and leave blowing went on till early in the fall. Saturdays started around 6:00 am and finished around 1. By the end, we were exhausted. College football and naps followed quickly after. I rarely made it through a full game. Day time sleeping always makes me feel a little guilty, like wasting time.

But really, who cares if you like naps or if you don’t? For me it’s an old view that naps are for the lazy. Why is my inner voice always shaming me for dozing off? Is it that old Protestant work ethic fighting for space in my conscience? Proverbs alone list ‘laziness’ in multiple spots and multiple ways. “Go to the ant you sluggard, consider its ways and be wise” (chapter 6:6). Why should naps get lumped in with that shameful fool from the Proverbs the “sluggard”? It’s pretty obvious Solomon was describing avoidance of work, not a welcomed snooze after a hard day. But the image of the daytime nap, as fit for a bum persists in my mind. Some things take willful courage to get over, at least until the snoring kicks in. Besides is watching 2 hours of TV really better than collapsing on the chaise like an overfed St. Bernard?

 Some cultures work napping into the daytime routine, to the point where afternoon business slows to a crawl. I noticed when I was in China how the afternoon work basically stopped, especially in the summer. The laborers even took long breaks and even napped after lunch in the shade. Same thing for the shops and restaurants in town. Chinese teachers know how to deal with post lunch grogginess, sack out on the office couches before afternoon classes begin.

 As an English teacher I lived at the school and early on, tried to get administrative stuff done during the lunch break. I’d march into the secretary’s office and wake them up to help me with some meaningless chore. I’m sure they rolled their eyes every time I barged in demanding they interpret some obscure bit of paperwork. Or I’d ask the IT guy to wake up and fix the internet connection. Hey don’t blame me, fix the modem man I got baseball scores to check! I learned to relax a little more with every passing month. They work long days (8 am to 8 pm) during the week and they only got every other weekend off.  A brutal schedule for anyone. I never got hip to their daily nap routine though.

I’m sure there are studies that show improved memory and alertness go up with short naps in the daytime. I’m a believer in the adaptability of the person though. Each one of us is unique, but despite that we can also get into a regular pattern of efficiency with or without naps. We might need to eat less during the day or sleep more at night, but efficient people thrive because they want to, not because they took a 30 minute snooze. Most of us have had to work a different schedule at some point in life. I feel much better with a regular 9 to 5 type schedule than an evening shift or a midnight shift. But I’ve done all 3.

Other than the laziness quirk I’ve always had about napping, there is the very real problem of wasting a good chunk of the day with a 2 hour siesta. On those days the napping is so good we reset the alarm for another hour, and another. When we finally roll off the couch and stumble to the kitchen and notice the clock. We’ve slept through another afternoon. Napping feels like disengaging. Not the good kind either where you unwind and de-stress, the “has-anyone-seen-Adam-this-year?” kind. If it leads to avoidance of projects or learning or spending time with loved ones it’s probably laziness. I guess that’s what Solomon was getting at. Sluggards or not, snoozing till late in the day feels amazing until the shame factor kicks in.

Now I love to nap after a long run or long week. It’s like a little reward, especially when football is on.