Experience in the Woods: Psalm 116

 

Psalm 116: Start at the Tower

“I love the Lord, because He has heard my voice and my supplications. Because He has inclined His ear to me, therefore I will call upon Him as long as I live”. (1-2)

A Refuge 

So much of that verse sums up my history with God. Especially when I was younger, God was a refuge and high tower in times of trouble. I tried to do most of life on my own from the ages of 17 to 30 something. I started at 17 because it’s when I graduated high school. I went to a Christian school, attended church weekly and believed whole heartedly in salvation for all and the second coming. But it takes years to develop a relationship with God, where He is more than just a refuge. He will always be that of course, but it’s meant to be a starting point in the life of a believer.

We run to a refuge when nothing else is available and danger is closing in. A classic example of a refuge is a lookout tower in the woods. Its purpose is for the watchman to look for wildfires and notify the authorities. But it’s also the safest place to hide from predators. The unique perspective one gets from a high place determines the next step he’ll take. Whenever I’ve gotten myself into a mess in life I’ve looked for the tower. It helps to reset my soul when I’m in distress. I also feel completely safe, even while the fires spread around me.

A Protector

I read a book a few years ago called Those Who Wish Me Dead now a movie with Angelina Jolie. The story goes, a 12 year old sees a murder and has to go into witness protection. The couple hiding him live in Montana and take troubled kids on wilderness hikes. It’s supposed to be the best way to hide him. They teach survival skills and navigation in some of the harshest terrain. But eventually the past catches up to the boy. After a chaotic chase, he stumbles up to a tower manned by a former smokejumper; she becomes his protector in a threatening and dangerous world.     

We need that comfort throughout our lives. In different phases of life whether student, employee, parent and grandparent we get lost and afraid no matter how many times we’ve walked the trails.

But God wants us to get beyond just needing to be bailed out because we didn’t watch the weather or pack the right equipment. He gives us equipment to use in our journey. It’s designed for the terrain, the weather and the topography. It’s more than just a map of pitfalls, depressions and inclines. Our equipment has the ability to change circumstances. Our words direct our path. The agreement we have on earth comes from the One who conquered the grave. Jesus gives us authority to carry around with us in the form of scripture. We don’t have to run back to the tower every time the sky looks ominous. It’s our duty to use what we already have.

A Compass

This is simpler to say than to know, often because we have the wrong view of God. He doesn’t exist to fulfill our personal goals and visions. That takes a while to figure out as well. Culture works against the notion that God is all we need. It’s a selfish kind of philosophy that (even among Christians) centers around hopes, dreams and aspirations of the individual. As a philosophy it’s somewhere between humanism and hedonism. Needless to say, it’s antithetical to the Creator’s vision for humanity. The more we use the compass, the less we run to the tower. We understand when to go high and when to go low, where to find water and how to set up shelter.

And even better, we begin to lead our own crews through the trails that have now become familiar. There will be other boys who join us for protection, teaching and a new beginning. They’re as unfamiliar as we were at the beginning, just as self-indulgent too. But no matter how scary the surroundings, we’ve learned to overcome them and find our way. The tower is always there. It’s a constant in our lives when we’re lost and scared, we orient ourselves below it.

Conclusion

 Stay in the woods long enough and you’ll experience a fire, a flood, a freeze. You’ll be lost at least once and likely run out of food. But with experience comes peace. It’s why the author of Psalm 116 can say in verse 6 and 7 “I was brought low and He saved me. Return to your rest, O my soul, for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you.”

The weather won’t change, only our ability to trust in the one Who overcame the storm.

 

OKC Run to Remember

I ran the OKC marathon yesterday. Time 5:43

 Actually, run is a bit of a misnomer. The first half was a run and the second was a combination of walking and jogging. The marathon didn’t go as planned, but at least it was a fun experience. I know it’s unusual to talk about a grueling affair like a marathon and call it “fun”. But as the route winds through different areas of the city, runners get to see locals out in groups cheering you on. More than one church had a choir outside singing gospel hymns as we passed by. Most of the neighborhoods had festive themes, I remember a boating theme and a gorilla theme. People waving flags, wearing costumes and handing out Jello shots and mimosas lined the roads. Kids could be seen everywhere holding funny signs “The End is Not Near” and “Run Like the Winded”. They shouted motivational statements “Looking Good” and “You’re Amazing” while trying to high fives from everyone. I passed at least two high school bands in full uniform playing selected ‘rah-rah’ pieces.  

The festive atmosphere is enough to try it sometime if you haven’t. I recommend the half marathon because it’s more accessible. I won’t say it’s easy, but with a little training most people can compete and enjoy themselves. The one is Oklahoma City is called the “Run to Remember” and has only been around for 23 years. It’s a fundraiser meant to honor the legacy of those who died in the bombing of 1995. You see the victim’s faces as you make the final turn before the finishing stretch. The organizers created a personal sign for each one, a thoughtful and somber gesture connecting runner to victim.

I rented an Air B&B (an old Victorian) which was very close to the downtown area. I searched for it based on it’s proximity to the start of the race. I had hoped to walk there but felt better about driving once morning came. I needed to get coffee from McDonalds before the race and that required having my car. But once I left, the police started putting up barricades on the roads. I wouldn’t have been able to get back to the old Victorian if I wanted to, the road now off limits. But I managed a decent spot right behind the memorial and walked to the start. I was an hour early at least. A pastor had given a short invocation before the race. I caught just the end of it and sang a worship song with the crowd. I was mostly impressed that in a large city in America, outright worship of God is still permitted even encouraged.

I expected the pace groups to be separated a little more than they were. Depending on your pace, you were expected to enter the mass of runners at various points. If you ran at a 10:00 minute pace (like me) you enter a few hundred yards behind the 9:00 pace and so on. It’s not ideal because it ensures a slow start for everyone except the handful of people in the front. But I found my pace pretty quickly after making the first turn. It’s a jumble of people (19,000 and up) who occasionally get in the way but it’s’ not hard to get around them. I started feeling winded around the 8 mile mark. I knew something wasn’t right because I shouldn’t have been so tired so soon into the run. My stamina and energy went down from there and never recovered. I managed to finish but it felt like a failure.

This happens on occasion and I don’t know what to do about it. I ran a short 3 mile practice run a few months ago on a chilly Thursday morning. For some reason I barely finished. Other days I could run 12 or 15 without much difficulty. I’m never sure what the reason is. Some days you just aren’t yourself.

Fortunately, the owner (or caretaker) of the Victorian Bed & Breakfast allowed me to come back after the race and shower before leaving. Checkout time was 10:00 am normally. I didn’t get back until after 1:00 pm. The race finish wasn’t near the start, something I probably should have known. That meant asking the volunteers how I could get back. I took the light rail back to the city center, thanks to a couple other runners who knew the layout of the downtown. But my biggest concern was that I’d get sick on the train. But I managed to hold it together on the short ride to the memorial, where my car was, and drive back to the Victorian. After a quick shower I packed and headed out.

I’ve been going through some soul searching ever since. What caused my meltdown? Should I even be doing marathons? How could I have been so unprepared? Whatever the answer, I wont stop the training runs. I do enjoy the Saturday group sessions and they keep me fit and improving my overall stamina. Event or no event, I’m a runner now.   

 

The Family Renewal Plan for America

 

Good Governance Starts With Respect for Families

What is the biggest challenge for America going forward? 

The answers would likely be as varied as the topography. Finance gurus would point to the economics while builders to the infrastructure. Politicians might mention energy crises or education. What about our lack of understanding on Artificial Intelligence and what it portends for future work? But without a common moral thread for our varied (and selfish) thinking it’s not possible to think correctly. Christian Renewal for America starts with the smallest unit, the family. Strong families are the backbone of good governance and with their intentional nurturing of the next generation, they’ll build strong communities.

We need to get back to first principles in governance.

First Principles

I came across this verse in Proverbs “He who is often rebuked, and hardens his neck, will suddenly be destroyed, and that without remedy. When the righteous are in authority, the people rejoice; but when a wicked man rules, the people groan.” (Chapter 29: 1-2) Normally Proverbs doesn’t link one set of verses to the next. The chapters are often disconnected in their content. In this case however, there is reason to believe that weak governance encourages rebellion. In America we elect leaders to legislate, execute and judge.

When we lose our connection with voting rights, we loose our voice. But a country doesn’t just lose voting rights all at once. It becomes less important in a number of ways. The most straightforward one is by trading morality for convenience. We do this by ignoring the school curriculum where our kids attend. Or by trading family time for work, play and personal hobbies. It’s not strange to connect the increasing wickedness in the country to the collapse of the family. The family is the most important unit for civilization, democracy and Christian liberty. It’s the smallest governing body that exists. Accountability, support, education and cooperation all exit within it. Stubbornness plants a seed when we reject the value of family in our lives.

With the family weak it’s much easier to break apart other traditions.  

Don't Trust DC  

If you stop teaching civics, you lose the connection that voting has in the minds of citizens. People get fooled at the ballot box all the time. Politicians make outlandish claims and don’t deliver, tax rates go up even after they were supposed to stay the same. But voting and getting fooled is better than believing you live in a rigged system. I don’t mean it’s rigged from top to bottom, I just wonder how much national elections really matter. We’ve seen federal agencies (FBI, IRS) used like a mafia goon squad to advance a communist agenda. Maybe this was always the case but it’s becoming obvious that our lives aren’t free or private.

It’s clear from all the LGBT signaling the government does, that the family and Christianity are the enemy.

A decadent citizenry is a stubborn one that got that way by ignoring the boundaries of natural law. God’s laws on nature are meant to keep humanity from crossing into debasement. When we allow children to change their sex through surgery and permit sexual deviance of all kinds, we’ve crossed into judgement territory. Those who won’t change will be destroyed “suddenly”. Proverbs implies that these have been “often rebuked” or made aware of their sin on multiple occasions. It’s up to Christians to point the way toward salvation and be very clear about the eternal dangers of chronic wickedness and stubbornness in the face of truth.

Natural Laws

Good governance at its central core is important to keeping out of control wickedness at bay. When criminals don’t fear the law it encourages crime. In San Francisco they’ve basically decriminalized shoplifting. It’s led to gangs of kids teaming up to rob businesses of thousands of dollars of merchandise in one swoop. We’ve seen flash mobs crashing through department stores with arms full of loot. Violent crime has also increased in major cities, the district attorneys aren’t charging with felonies. They’re being let out of jail after a fine, or by giving them a misdemeanor charge. Many large cities have scrapped cash bail for violent offenses. Lawlessness pushes the law abiding out of the cities where they fear for safety.

There is a willful attempt to cede fear and chaos in cities. When the wicked rule the people groan. Proverbs connects the ideas of stubborn people to poor governance. The reverse is also true, respect for law and order everywhere gives citizens a hope for a bright future. Spiritual renewal starts with the family. Big ideas and top down approaches won’t fix the mess our institutions are in. We can rebuild them with a respect for rule of law and Christian liberty.

 

Taiwan: A Country in Limbo

 

Is Taiwan Close to Being Subdued?

What’s the state of affairs around Taiwan’s defense? Beijing makes aggressive moves, drills and war games, just outside of their air defense zone regularly. It could be a bluff to try and draw out some response from Taipei. If they shot down a plane, the CCP could use it as a pretext to start a war. China considers Taiwan a “breakaway province” anyway, so it’d more like a police crackdown to them.

Officially the US still has a treaty with Taiwan, for whatever that’s worth. Nowhere in the treaty does it commit the US to come to their aid if Beijing sends troops and starts dropping bombs. The language of the agreement is vague in that State Department way of agreeing but not committing.

No one wants to get in a hot war over Taiwan. We’ve had enough of fighting other battles for a while. We can’t get into another one.  

Besides, the US isn’t in a strong position vis a vis China. They manufacture most of our consumer goods, electronics and clothing. War would be much costlier than in the 80s. Back then the Chinese were still trying to feed large swaths of their rural population. Russia was surely a greater threat. But now, China is the world’s factory. We’d suddenly see what it was like to start manufacturing for ourselves again. But starting up domestic industries out of desperation would be tough. Good for America long term, yes. But painful in the short term.

 If you think the start and stop of industries during Covid was bad wait until we get into a hot war with China. It would be like throwing a moving yacht into reverse. The whiplash alone will cause the most wreckage.

How would Beijing actually inflict their will on Taiwan? I’ve read some reports that say a blockade makes the most sense. Beijing could set up a perimeter at strategic ports around the island and start telling foreign commercial ships to turn around. That is unless their country of origin (say the United Kingdom) agrees to cut off all ties to the Taiwanese government. A blockade is closest to how China has operated so far. Seeking to isolate the country, CCP officials put pressure on other countries for either “recognizing” Taiwan or having diplomatic relations with them. Before China joined the WTO (World Trade Organization) and gained some legitimacy few thought war was even possible. This was 2001.

But the mainland isn’t a poor third world country anymore, even if large parts of it are rural farmland. They’ve basically told the rest of the world they own the South China sea. An absurdly large territory that encircles a vast number of other countries Vietnam, Malaysia, Philippines, Brunei and Singapore. But in politics and global domination, the big and bold make the decisions. I read a fair amount of opinions that think an invasion is unlikely. Mostly because it’s really hard to win a war and impose your will. Even the United States got out of Afghanistan after 20 years without accomplishing a whole lot. Ditto for Iraq.

After we deposed Saddam, we felt the sting of a counter insurgency. That took another few years to get control of, and a troop surge, followed by another troop surge. It’s easy to look back and be critical about the overall mission, but the simple fact remains, war is complicated. Another aspect of the Chinese PLA (People Liberation Army) is the lack of actual combat they’ve had. In order to be good at fighting and subduing populations you need experience. The Chinese haven’t had any real wars to speak of. That doesn’t bode well for success in a foreign endeavor, even one with a significantly smaller population. Military manuals and schools of thought are built on the framework of previous excursions. You need to have combat in order to teach it, at least if you’re invading another country that’s usually the case.

Of course this doesn’t mean they won’t succeed. But it does mean it won’t be as easy as they hope. Anyway, China doesn’t want to blow up Taiwan. They want to capture their industries and steal their intellectual property. Taiwan has some of the largest semiconductor and telecom industries in the world. The wealth of the country is the real prize. As a side issue, the United States has sadly lost a lot of clout as a defender of liberal democracies. I realize this probably sounds a little naïve, maybe World War II was the last time we were thought of like that. But if America still is a force for good around the world it means other countries need to believe it too.

Our strength and position (militarily, economically) is significantly weaker than it was 20 years ago. China knows this. It’s why they’re acting belligerent toward Taiwan. I’m not sure we could do much other than pressure them diplomatically. Maybe that’s the best choice for now.  

 

 

Nikki Haley's Insignificant Campaign Platform: Budgeting

Middle Class Americans Won't Go for This: Nikki Haley's Big Gamble On Budgeting

Is Nikki Haley actually going to make cutting the deficit a cornerstone of her campaign? What year is this I forget? It’s a useless platform for a Republican party that’s moved on.

Paul Ryan tried this trick in 2012 and failed miserably. It’s the donor class’s favorite issue for their shills. After Romney/Ryan’s failed presidential effort, a lot of America started to figure out how the GOP game is played. Run on issues that are easily dispensed with once you get elected. Don’t embarrass the donors with icky lower class concerns like the border, abortion and crime. You can always give half measures to the pro-life rubes. Tell them you believe life is precious and all that, but don’t support any real measures that restrict abortion. Don’t attend the big national marches or be seen taking pictures with leading abolitionists.

All of this amounts to advice from their highly paid consultants.

The federal budget will never be meaningfully cut without a major crisis. Too many sectors, institutions, non-profits, contractors and ne'er-do-wells rely on it. It’s why it’s the perfect issue to run on for unserious politicians. It’s similar to the Free Tibet movement we saw in colleges in the late nineties and early 2000s. Actors like Richard Gere and Brad Pitt used to protest the CCP’s brutal crackdown of the Dali Lama. China hadn’t penetrated Hollywood then. Actors and directors (Martin Scorsese) could bloviate about the atrocities committed by Beijing with little consequence. Suddenly China became powerful and put an end to the weasel words, we don’t hear much about it anymore.

The point is to sound serious without having to prove it.

Free Tibet was a niche movement that could never make a difference. Reigning in the budget is hardly a niche idea, but like Free Tibet, designed to be a talking point and nothing else. We only get real change through a collapse in the dollar. Niki Haley’s just the latest example of a presidential candidate who doesn’t understand the mood of the country. She was a good governor, but a little too institutional. She is proudly American, supported immigration laws and represented us well at the U.N under Trump. I’ve always thought she explained how her immigrant parents became Americans, a beautiful story.

But we don’t live in the age of budget battles. We don’t live in that country anymore. Our thuggish government is forcing Christianity out of the public square and making everyone accept sexual deviance as a sacrament. Biden’s press secretary Katherine-Jean-Pierre talked of the difficulties ‘trans’ kids face. This, just a few weeks after the shooting of the kids and staff at a Christian school, by a confused trans woman. The administration is letting us know they think of Christians as the enemy.

It's not that we don’t have a budget issue, but we’ve had a spending problem for so many years that’ it’s almost part of doing business. Also, talking about accounting in an age of anarchy is just tone deaf. It’s like letting flash mobs steal product from the store but making sure the cash drawer balances at the end of the day. The cash drawer needs to balance, but the problem staring us in the face is lawlessness, and why thieves are suddenly emboldened to carry armfuls out the door. They don’t fear reciprocity. They don’t fear it from the police, the shopkeeper or the other patrons. They don’t fear the District Attorneys in the cities will charge them with a crime.

It's not even really Niki Haley’s fault. We’ve heard that politics is downstream of culture. That means when the representatives start considering legislation for anything, the culture (attitudes, practices) are already established among the citizens. There is little room to push back against an entrenched mood. Conservatives miss this. They ignore the local and state issues close to home until they’re overwhelmed by them. When it’s finally before a national audience they want ‘tough’ talking representatives to hold back the tide by voting NO. But it’s a much tougher ask at the federal level. Marijuana legalization will likely track the same way. Recreational marijuana is legal in 21 states today, that doesn’t include the medical variety which is legal in 18. How likely is going to be to stop it at the national level?

I do wonder how far we are from elections at the national level even mattering anymore. This is cynical I know. But something like 65-70% of Republican voters believe the election was stolen in 2020. I’ve said so too in this blog. But if that many citizens (voters) believe that their choices won’t matter in a tight race, how long can they keep going through the motions? Niki Haley isn’t up to the challenge because her campaign issues are a throw back to a time when we still trusted (sort of) our officials.

The existential crisis we face is rooted in immorality. The issues the country faces, sexual confusion, crime, drug abuse and abortion all point to a lack of the fear of the Lord. That won’t be a platform anytime soon. But it’s time to work on our local communities again. If elections still matter, push out the local communists at every level. 

Nikki Haley will remain a force in South Carolina, but it won’t extent to the national level.

Naomi Wolf's The Bodies of Others: A Review

 

Naomi Wolf is the Resistance or: How to Make a Contrarian?

Naomi Wolf’s The Bodies of Others is the retelling of a human tragedy we’re still dealing with. For all the problems with a lockdown, the loss of freedom and the expansion of the technocracy, the worst of it was our lack of humanity towards each other. Covid transformed this traditionally liberal author to a cultural contrarian in a short time. Writers know how to research. She couldn’t get honest information from traditional sources about the case numbers. The logic for locking down and masking didn’t make sense. The vaccines and passports were unlike anything Americans were used to. She pushed against the media narratives and got shut out of social media, shunned by colleagues and snubbed by friends. Esteemed medical professionals like Jay Bhattacharya and Dr. Peter McCullough told her a different story. They also paid a price.

Her conclusion? Covid was hyped and used to keep us apart, for money, control and spiritual darkness.

The mechanism was fear. Fear keeps people in their homes. It keeps them away from others and distrustful of others, disease spreaders you know? Fear makes people pliable and dependent on a program, an institution or a medical solution. Fear rallies people around heavy restrictions and creates an enemies list of those who aren’t on board. Those who resist are heretics. This automatic sorting, dirty from clean, caring from selfish is a kind of strategic totalitarianism. It’s an evil response that pits us against each other.  

A refreshing bit near the end tells of why she agreed to talk openly about God. An objective look at the crisis exposed a lot of trampling of individual liberty and by extension, wholesale power grabs by bureaucrats. Not only at the federal level did we see “officials” deciding on masks and “essential” businesses, but also at the lowest levels of city government. And why? Because big tech is positioned to succeed when human interaction is restricted. That’s true of technology in good times. Despite the advantages of Zoom meetings, next day delivery and electronic communications, big tech thrives when people stay apart.

You can’t make money when people go to the park or attend a play at the local high school.

A favorite passage from chapter 8 that sums up the whole book nicely. “This was waged by the lords and ladies of technology; they used technology – and leveraged the culture and civilization of technology – to wage asymmetrical combat against the whole of humanity itself and to strike out against human movement, speech, touch, ingenuity, bodies, religion, families, schooling, and especially culture.” (page 140)

There is another reason technology succeeded, money. A quick look at the profit margins of tech giants like Apple, Amazon and Microsoft all saw massive increases. This doesn’t even include the drug companies (Pfizer, Moderna) after their vaccine rollouts. It’s not a stretch to think they knew this was coming and maybe lobbied hard to keep everything shut down. When you realize personal interaction is contrary to a world of technological supremacy, the duplicity makes sense. This is Naomi’s point, brilliantly highlighted throughout her anecdotes and research. The result of big tech’s reach was a society that became cruel and rejected human interacting for longer than was necessary.

Like most books it’s always the personal stories that make the biggest impact. I loved her resistance (polite though it was) to the café that wouldn’t serve unvaccinated customers. Or her refusal in the subway to stand in a designated area. The police even wrote her a citation. I don’t have a lot of sympathy for people who chose to stay away from family and friends. Wolf talks of older men and women with sunken faces, resigned to their fate because of a disease. Why did so many put up with it? I can understand a few months, maybe, but years? There is just no excuse for that level of fear.

Resistance is the only weapon we have. It doesn’t have to be violent, but it should be without apology. When you lose the right to vote what else is there? Naomi Wolf doesn’t mention the 2020 election in her book but I can’t imagine a more apt demonstration of the loss of our basic rights. Millions of Americans cast votes that were overwhelmed with fraudulent ballots in key states. It’s called cheating. The authority to lock people in their homes, once established, would not be relinquished. Our national voting ceased to matter on a national scale after 2020. Covid was the excuse.

I’m surprised she missed this connection, but she’s on a path toward enlightenment (in a sense) so I won’t beat her up over this. If there is a criticism, it’s over the exaggerated way she contrasts pre Covid life in New York and London to post Covid life. In an early scene she describes multi-ethnic groups (all races and creeds) living in harmony, going to festivals together and working toward the common good. I rolled my eyes a bit here, does anyone believe these groups got along well before Covid? But it works well as a contrast to the destruction to come and looking back…probably felt like heaven.

I first became interested in this book because of an interview I watched on Mark Steyn’s channel. Before that, I read her heartfelt apology to conservatives over the January 6^th debacle. Tucker released some unseen footage that showed a different picture than the narrative we were sold. Big surprise, another lie from the Deep State. At this point though it’s taken on faith that we live in an era of big lies.

The worst thing we can do is surrender our humanity over a ‘crisis’. There will be another after all, whether imagined or real, that forces us to choose between obedience or independence. Hopefully we will have learned something the next time.

Abraham's Faith for The Impossible

 

Being Fully Persuaded in God's Plan: Romans 4:18-25

Abraham’s fully persuaded faith in God’s promise is something that took a lifetime. With faith comes a steadfastness that surpasses natural abilities and arbitrary time frames.  

“Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, ‘So shall your offspring be.’” (verse 18)

What I notice, is that faith isn’t something that happens quickly. How do you get to a point of absolute trust in a plan that’s so far seemed impossible? The next few verses offer a closer look. “Without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead—since he was about a hundred years old.” (verse 19) You might think that as the years added up, his faith would become less strong. But his belief is sure, despite the lack of a discernable path forward. Abraham spent a lifetime filing up his faith reservoir by taking steps of obedience.  

But faith is not the opposite of doubt.

Experiencing Small Victories

 Both can exist within a person to varying degrees. Have you ever believed God for a financial breakthrough or healing from a headache? I was short on money one year but desperately wanted to go to Illinois for the Christmas break. My ride was all lined up, I rode with at least one of my brothers to share gas. But I didn’t have a lot to spend. It was going to be a tight vacation. I needed extra money, but I’d worked all the hours available. I couldn’t see a way to make any more before we left. I prayed about it. I don’t remember it being a particularly spiritual prayer, something along the lines of “help!”.

That year, everyone got a Christmas bonus. I was ecstatic, relieved, joyful and overwhelmed. I had been there 8 years at the time and we never got a bonus. Now I’ve been there 15 years and we’ve still not had another. It wasn’t a lot of money but it covered a couple of tanks of gas a few meals along the road. God was showing me that no prayer is too small. Here’s what’s important though. That small victory went into my faith reservoir. Whenever I think of God’s goodness I’m reminded of that unexpected blessing.

Now back to Abraham. Abraham didn’t serve the Lord until well into adulthood. His tribe worshipped idols and sacrificed children. God brought him out of that and moved him into a literal faith-based relationship the only way He could. We know about the angel stopping him from sacrificing his own son, Isaac. But how many small victories did Abraham put into his faith reservoir? At a hundred years old, he had become “fully persuaded” in the Heavenly Father’s promise. There is only one way that happens for anyone. We need to spend a lot of time stretching our faith for small and big things.

Abraham’s faith was connected to his righteousness. “…not for him alone, but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness—for us who believe in him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead.” (verse 23) Another way to say this is “And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek Him.” (Hebrews 11:6)

Dealing with Doubt

We have a faith reservoir and a doubt reservoir. These are not mutually exclusive. If they were than we would put our trust in God’s previous miracles in our lives. My nick of time bonus money should have been all the faith I needed. If we didn’t also deal with doubt, the faith should have pushed out whatever lingering doubt remained. Why then did I not put my trust in God every time a financial need arose? I’d seen God’s blessing after all. The apostles asked Jesus to help with their unbelief when they couldn’t help a demon possessed man in Mark 9:24. That tells me that even with faith, doubt remains a stumbling block.

It doesn’t have to though. We can feed doubt the same way we feed faith. Through experiences, attitudes and practice we add to our internal tanks. These both shape our philosophy on life, they’re the energy behind it our approach to trouble. If Abraham’s life is any guide, time and patience in the presence of God add up to big time faith. Paul calls it “fully persuaded faith”. Abraham had doubts too. He said his wife, Sarah, was his sister to avoid trouble with the local ruler Abimelek.

Over his life though, the faith reservoir is being filled as God reveals more of Himself to Abraham. His doubt diminishes to the point of being non-existent. As a human he has the capacity for doubt, as well as fear, but his faith builds in trials. It should be encouraging that Christians today have the Holy Spirit as a guide and helper in all things. We have tools Abraham never had. We also have a record of what faithfulness looks like in the scriptures. Abraham had to figure this out with no faith road map.

Conclusion

Isaac was an answer to a promise from God that both parents had waited for, until there was no physical way to have kids. How did the increasing years waiting for the promise not increase doubt instead of building faith? Because of the obedient steps that Abraham followed, beginning with his trek out of Ur. Every step of faith (even the small ones) helped build fill his reservoir, until the time frame didn’t matter.

Our time frame with God is an arbitrary concept. I’m learning how to fill up the reservoir and ignore the time frame. God is faithful and I’m moving toward being fully persuaded.